Islam is a religion which promotes love and peace, in general. If we specifically talk about relationships, Islam preaches kindness and softness. If we break these relationships down even further and talk about only a husband-wife relationship, then no way does Islam encourage a husband to beat or hit his wife. Allah Almighty says,
“Live with them on a footing of kindness and equity. If ye take a dislike to them it may be that ye dislike a thing, and Allah brings about through it a great deal of good.” (Quran: An-Nisaa 19)
This Ayah from the Holy Quran clearly states that Allah wants both husband and wife to respect each other, and live with each other nicely and peacefully. Even if they find something which is upsetting, then they should not lose hope. Rather, they should pray to Allah because everything happening is due to Allah’s will. They may dislike something about their husband or wife, but it could actually be a blessing in disguise.
Anger is something frowned upon in Islam. Even if a husband finds something extremely annoying about his wife or her behavior, he is advised to think about it with a cool mind. He is not encouraged to give her a beating. It is not acceptable.
Actually, the wife can also do something which would let her avoid her husband’s beating. She should listen to him, take responsibility. If her husband does not like her behaviour, she should avoid it, rather than being stubborn. She should act sensibly and maturely.
However, there are husbands who get so angry at the tiniest things. They let their anger get the better of them, and start beating their wives. They do not realize that sometimes, the children can also witness this brutal act, and there is a huge negative effect on the young innocent minds. They will be disturbed.
Before you raise your hand at your wife, think and reflect upon the consequences. However, in some serious moral misconduct, a ‘light beating’ is permitted, but that is an extreme measure, which is best avoided.
Anything which can be achieved with kind words should not be given the extra taste of physical abuse. If there is something which you dislike about your wife, talk to her about it. Be firm and let her know your concerns. Just do not hit her, straight like that. It will scare her, and then you will also have to be answerable to God about this action. Men are considered as the authority figures, but this does not give them any right to start physically abusing their women. They are the superior sex and are given more power, but with more power, comes more responsibility.
Our Prophet Muhammad (SAW) never hit any of his wives, and he disliked those who did. Be respectful of your wives and fear Allah. Surely, your patience will be rewarded.